I rarely find myself feeling uncomfortable.

I’m not talking about the feeling you get when you’re in a room with a bunch of people that you don’t know.  I’m not talking about trying to find something to do with your hands, when you are in a situation that is unfamiliar to you.  My uncomfortable level is a mix of nausea and shock, disgust and contempt, confusion and anger all rolled into one.

It started with a simple conversation with a parent who was holding his child.  The kid was adorable.  He was somewhere in the 2-4 age bracket and had dull red hair.  The father seemed normal enough and gave off the typical young father vibe, sleep deprived and disheveled.

Within the first few sentences the father was half-listening, as he was distracted by his child trying to grab everything in sight.  Actually, it was an endearing scene… it reminded me of one of my nephews.

But then it got uncomfortable real fast!

In an effort to better focus on our conversation, the father picked up the young child and held him in his arms while resting on his hip.  After the father would speak, he moved his head around and place a kiss on the child’s cheek.  I didn’t notice anything odd at first as I was busy formulating responses, but as the frequency of the kisses increased I couldn’t help but become totally focused on these kisses.

They were not normal parent-to-child kisses.  This was not a simple lip to cheek embrace.  These were not even extended kisses that typically last 3-4 seconds…These were big, wet, sloppy kisses.  The type of kisses that are normally practiced by middle schoolers, who wag their tongues and push their lips against one another without any sensualism.  But this father was breaking a cardinal kissing rule between family members.  Never let your inner lip touch a family member.

With extended family members, I’ve run the gamut of family kisses; the kiss on the cheek, the kiss on the lips, and the “air kiss.”  BUT NEVER have I rolled my lips apart and given any family member the wetness of my inner lips.

If I’m lucky, I’ll have the good fortunate of someday raising my own child.  I will love them with plenty of hugs and kisses but they will never get my inner lips, because it’s just wrong!

PS – The man wiped a long stream of snot from the child’s face at one point and then insisted on shaking my hand when he left…gross!